ASU Girl Day In The Life

The entire internet is in awe of this ASU Girl’s Day-In-The-Life but anyone with half of a brain knows it’s complete nonsense

ASU Girl’s Viral Day In The Life is Nonsense – As a proud graduate of West Virginia University Class of 2010, I always remember to thank the lord above that we were riding the wave of smart phones and social media and not fully reliant on it like kids these days. 

If you wanted to pick up a girl, you did it at the bar, on campus, or at a house party and face them your Facebook, which was still for college students only or AIM name.

There were no smart phones with dating apps available and texting wasn’t really “mainstream” yet either. On top of that, influencers didn’t exist, China didn’t deploy TikTok on America, and Twitter wasn’t even a social media platform until my senior year. 

What happened at West Virginia between 2006-2010 stayed there but here are some pics I dug up on Facebook. If I’m going to trash this new influencer lifestyle, I have to paint my own picture first. Fair is fair.

Day in the Life: West Virginia University Class 2010:

Sure, there are photos but compared to what’s going on now with college kids and social media, thankfully, we missed all of that. There’s no video of me standing on top of my roof on Jones Ave (shoutout Sunnyside) on a random weekday with a wooden sign that read “Honk If You Love America” and my roommates chugging a Natty Light with every passing honk from a car.

There’s no videos of the same event where my roommate was so drunk, he fell off the roof and crashed into the trashcans below, only to pop up and continue to drink like a cat with nine lives.  There’s definitely no videos of the house parties we used to throw where we literally had to kick people out to bring more kegs inside. 

What happened at college was sacred. It was a beautiful mess of kids trying to figure out life away from home and at West Virginia specifically, that was quite the learning process. 

As for Arizona State University, we’re literally talking about Morgantown West. ASU and WVU are the top party schools in the nation and that’s why I’m calling bullshit on this video that’s going viral all over the internet showing a “Day In The Life” of an ASU girl. 

Not buying it, so let’s cut through the soft filters and midday matcha shots.

There’s a video of an Arizona State University student that’s gone viral this week — not once, not twice, but what feels like a dozen times on every social platform. It’s a typical “day in the life” montage with dreamy lighting, outfit changes, casual luxury, and the now-infamous quote: “It’s detox week.”

Detox week at Arizona State University? The class of 2010 is literally dying over a statement like that and showing pity to anyone who actually buys this influencer fever dream as something that actually exists for an everyday college student.

ASU Girl Day In The Life: “The American collegiate experience is the envy of the world”

What an insane caption for an even more insane video from the Twitter account “TastefulLindy” who’s definitely not a real person. I’ll casually glance over that and get back to “Detox Week” at any college in America, which literally doesn’t exist.

Brother, if someone had told me detox week was a real thing in college, I would’ve just tapped out, packed my bags, and headed to trade school. We were out here eating leftover Little Cesars pizza from the back of someone’s Jeep Grand Cherokee while multiple blunts were being passed while we chased it all down with a $10 bottle of Burnetts flavored vodka and calling that dinner.

Detox? The closest we got to that was when we drank beers between the liquor.

And yet, the rest of the world sees this video and apparently thinks American college life is some live-action Disney Channel original.

ASU Day In The Life…White Party?

The ASU Myth, Fully Realized

Anyone who’s ever gone to college — real college, not the simulation in this girl’s video — had a friend who chose ASU. They didn’t go for the academics. They went because the school looked like a spring break music video.

Back then, it was grainy FlipCam footage of party fountains and neon tank tops. Now it’s this high-gloss, corporate-core lifestyle content that makes every ASU student look like they’re co-starring in a Vogue beauty routine.

But let’s talk about the actual video. Because, after watching it for the seventh time like some sort of TikTok hostage, I can confirm — it’s not that crazy.

She wakes up, does a little yoga, walks across a pristine campus in a Lululemon two-piece, grabs a smoothie, hits a Pilates class, spends 20 minutes picking out an outfit, then goes to a $200 dinner at Toca Madera like it’s a casual Tuesday. And somehow that has the world acting like this is a scene out of a cheesy Hollywood movie.

It’s Not That Deep. It’s Just a Wednesday.

To be clear — I’m not knocking the hustle. She’s living the influencer starter pack dream. But let’s not pretend this is some aspirational, elite lifestyle.

This isn’t Monaco. This is Tempe.

A fancy dinner and a cute outfit don’t make you royalty. They just make you a 21-year-old with a Chase Sapphire Preferred. You think this same routine hits the same if she’s at a Chili’s in Akron, Ohio? Of course not. But the formula works. Why? Because everyone wants the vibe, not the reality.

This stuff works because the internet runs on envy. Not relatability — envy.

The most impressive thing about the video is someone actually taking care of themselves and doing productive things instead of waking up to your friends crushing up lines with a full beer bong waiting for you as you try to get a grip on reality while nursing one of the worst hangovers of your life on an hours worth of sleep before heading over to watch Pat White and Steve Slaton beat the ever-living shit out of whatever football team came to Morgantown that week. 

And this girl’s about to spin that algorithm right into a million-dollar brand deal. You think I’m joking? Gen Z isn’t watching Netflix anymore. They’re watching this. “Day in the life” videos are the new sitcoms, and this is season one of a future Alani Nu partnership.

Shoutout to the original innovator of this genre too — that one guy who filmed his whole finance bro day with background music like he was Tony Stark. He kicked off the whole trend and now every college student with decent lighting and a pastel wardrobe is trying to make “my 8 a.m. econ class and oat milk latte” look like peak cinema.

I’m not mad. I’m impressed. She’s cracked the code. You don’t have to be special, you just have to look like you’re living a life people want to click on.

So yeah, the rest of the world can stay amazed. Meanwhile, the rest of us will be over here, fondly remembering when “detox” meant skipping the second pizza roll before beer pong.

What a time.

Join The Chase

unfiltered, opinionated, and certainly do not care if you like it or not.

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