Hospital evacuated after live World War I artillery shell discovered in patient’s ass

Hospital officials in Toulouse never expected a routine emergency room visit to escalate into a full-scale evacuation, but that is exactly what happened this weekend when a 24-year-old man arrived in extreme distress with a World War I artillery shell lodged inside his body. What began as a medical emergency quickly turned into a public safety situation involving surgeons, bomb disposal experts, firefighters, and law enforcement.

Per the New York Post, the patient was admitted late Saturday night to the Rangueil Accident and Emergency unit in southern France. Doctors initially treated him for severe discomfort caused by a large foreign object inserted into his rectum. During emergency surgery, medical staff made a startling discovery. The object was not a household item or medical device, but a live, eight-inch artillery shell dating back to 1918.

Once the nature of the object became clear, the Hospital was placed on lockdown procedures. Medical personnel immediately notified authorities due to the potential explosive risk. The facility was evacuated as a precaution, and a security perimeter was established around the building while bomb disposal experts and the fire brigade were dispatched to the scene.

Hospital Evacuation Turns Medical Emergency Into Public Safety Incident

The decision to evacuate the Hospital was driven by uncertainty. Although the shell had been inside the patient’s body, staff could not assume it was inert. Any mishandling or movement could have posed a serious risk to patients, staff, and emergency responders.

Bomb disposal specialists assessed the ordnance and ultimately determined it did not present an immediate danger. The shell was safely removed from the premises and taken away by authorities. The patient remained hospitalized following surgery and is expected to recover physically.

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Officials have not confirmed how the shell ended up inside the man. Sources cited in local reporting suggested the incident may have been the result of a reckless stunt or sexual experimentation. Medical staff reportedly indicated that cases involving injuries from sexual activity are not uncommon, though the involvement of military-grade ordnance is highly unusual.

Look, people have been shoving things up their asses for generations. This world is full of sick pups. But a live bombshell circa 1918? That’s new, and honestly, brave. You have to respect the man’s dedication to getting off. Nothing was stopping him, and if he exploded during the process, so be it.

That bombshell was getting up there, one way or another.

Not the First Time a Hospital Has Faced This Situation

As shocking as the story may sound, it is not unprecedented. The article from The Post notes that in 2022, another French Hospital was partially evacuated after an 88-year-old man arrived with a World War I artillery shell lodged in a similar manner. That incident followed a nearly identical sequence of events, including evacuation and bomb squad involvement.

Where are these French people getting these bombs, and why is their first course of action to shove it up their ass? What’s going on over there? I never pinned the French as prude but I also didn’t think they’d be buying WW1 relics off the dark web just to sit on them. Maybe I’m the prude one. Really puts it all into perspective.

With all the freaky shit flooding the news waves this week, this one was actually pretty timid all things considered. Not sure what that says about the current state of humanity. Can’t be good, but hey, it could probably be worse!