Venezuela ate sushi and pizza but tonight Team USA will serve them something else entirely
Team USA is locked in. Venezuela knocked off Japan and chanted “we ate sushi.” They beat Italy on Monday and came back with “we ate pizza.” Both corny as hell but I guess we can respect the commitment to the bit.
Venezuela fans chanting “we ate pizza” after beating Italy:
Tonight for the World Baseball Classic championship game against Team USA and I have been sitting here trying to figure out what the Americans can chant we go with after inevitably win it all.
The problem is there is nothing to roast Venezuela about that they actually care about.
The Maduro thing is off limits because most Venezuelans are probably happier about what happened there than anything that could happen in a baseball game. The oil thing does not land.
The 51st state line is always available and always the right call. We will figure it out after the final out. Either way that AI image of Maduro in a Team USA jersey is absolutely incredible and worth a look.
Maduro rocking a Team USA jersey:
— Richard Mozzarella (@RichardMotz) March 17, 2026
Team USA arrived to loanDepot Park today wearing game-worn gold medal Team USA hockey jerseys sent over by Jack Hughes.
Let that sink in for a second.
Canada showed up to the quarterfinal in silver medal hockey jerseys trying to use the Olympics as motivation against the country that beat them in the gold medal game.
Team USA is showing up to the World Baseball Classic championship game in the actual gold medal jerseys from that same tournament. That is what winning looks like and it’s the energy we are carrying into tonight.
Team USA rocking USA Men’s Olympic Hockey Sweaters:
Now about the lineup because it is not perfect and somebody has to say it.
Gunnar Henderson is sitting for Team USA. The man is 6-for-14 with two home runs and a double in this tournament. He hit the go-ahead shot in the semifinal against the Dominican Republic and he is on the bench for the championship game.
The reasoning is Eduardo Rodriguez is a lefty and Henderson hits .227 with a .678 OPS against lefties in his career compared to .287 and .893 against righties. The numbers say what they say. Sitting your hottest hitter in the championship game still feels wrong and it is going to feel even worse if this game is close in the seventh inning.
Pete Crow-Armstrong should be in over Byron Buxton too. PCA has been electric all tournament and Buxton getting the nod over him is a decision that requires more explanation than it got.
None of that matters if Nolan McLean is locked in from the jump and Team USA plays the way they are capable of playing. This roster is loaded and this team is one win away from a World Baseball Classic championship on home soil after years of building toward this moment.
Venezuela ate sushi. Venezuela ate pizza. Tonight Team USA is serving something entirely different. 8 PM. FOX. Miami. For Glory. Let’s finish it.
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