Bleacher Report’s Jalen Carter trade idea is the dumbest thing I’ve seen all summer

Jalen Carter for Josh Sweat. That’s the trade Bleacher Report wants the Eagles to “consider” before Week 1, per Moe Moton’s annual one-trade-per-team exercise that exists exclusively to make 32 fanbases mad in July.

Congratulations, Moe. It worked. I’m mad.

Let’s walk through this masterpiece. The Eagles, the team that has spent a decade turning the defensive line into a religious institution, should ship out a 25-year-old interior wrecking ball because Albert Breer said Howie Roseman is “hesitant” on the extension. And in return? Josh Sweat. A guy the Eagles already had. A guy they let walk. A guy who’s about to turn 30 and is currently sulking in the desert because Arizona is where pass rushers go to file workplace grievances.

We had Josh Sweat. We know exactly what Josh Sweat is. Howie watched him every day for seven years and decided the future was elsewhere. Now we’re supposed to trade the most talented defensive tackle in football to get him back?

Pass.

The Jalen Carter “hesitancy” is not what you think it is

Here’s the thing the trade-machine guys keep missing: hesitant to pay is not the same as looking to move.

Jeffery Simmons just reset the defensive tackle market north of $35 million a year. Carter’s camp saw that number and started drooling. Jalen Carter is coming off a down year with shoulder problems. Of course Howie is pumping the brakes. That’s not a crack in the relationship. That’s a negotiation. It’s what Howie does, and it’s why this roster stays loaded while other teams light their caps on fire.

The Eagles already picked up the fifth-year option. Carter is under contract through 2027. There is no gun to anyone’s head here. And when the Browns reportedly dangled Myles Garrett, a two-time Defensive Player of the Year, Philly said no. They said no to Myles Garrett. But sure, Josh Sweat gets it done.

What Jalen Carter actually is

Jalen Carter has 143 pressures and 13.5 sacks through three seasons, and pressure numbers from the interior are a different currency than pressure numbers off the edge. Guards do not block this man. Centers do not block this man. He collapsed pockets in a Super Bowl as a rookie. When he’s right, he is the single most unblockable interior player in the sport, and he does it at an age where his best football hasn’t even shown up yet.

Sweat is a fine player. Genuinely. But fine 29-year-old edge rushers are available every offseason. Generational 25-year-old defensive tackles are available approximately never, which is why the Eagles took him at nine when everyone else got scared.

Does Philly need edge help? Yes. Is the answer torching the interior of your defense to reacquire your own ex? No. That’s not roster building. That’s getting back with your college girlfriend because dating apps are exhausting.

The B/R piece even admits most of these proposals are small-time depth swaps — and then drops a franchise-altering blockbuster in the middle like it’s the same category as trading a sixth-rounder for a backup nose tackle.

Jalen Carter is not getting traded this offseason. He’s getting paid — maybe not this month, maybe not before camp, but eventually. Howie plays the long game better than anyone alive, and the long game does not involve handing your best young player to a rebuilding team for a guy you already broke up with.

File this one where it belongs. The trash.