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The Misery Report Presents: The NBA Draft Diary 2020

5:30 PM EST Welcome to the 1st Annual NBA Draft Diary presented by The Misery Report Podcast (and probably Sprite). In keeping with the theme of 2020, this draft promises to be somewhat of a shit-show where no one can agree who’s good and who’s the next Jan Vesely.

From what I gathered during my 90 minutes of prep, this draft contains a few promising prospects, a Ball family member, and 58 potential 3 and D wings.

The Sixers are set to pick at #21. Cant wait for them to choose a dude from the Ukraine who they can stash overseas while convincing fans he’s great. I will hopefully be joined by Drew Smith and Kevin Thomas also of the Misery Report.

Stay Tuned….

5:40 PM EST A major WOJ Bomb!!! Just when I thought I was about to settle on the couch in two pairs of sweat pants to watch PTI this tweet came across the wire..

Wow! This is a great move by the Sixers and Daryl Morey. Essentially they are clearing $80 million over the next three years off the cap and can now use that space to meaningfully improve the team. Getting a shooter and floor spacer in Danny Green doesn’t hurt at all either. Green is exactly the type of player the Sixers desperately needed since JJ Reddick left in free agency before last season.

Giving up a few late 1st and 2nd round picks with protections is not really a whole lot to part with. Im ecstatic! 2020 is making a major comeback!

6:01 PM EST

7:10 PM EST I forgot how much fun it is having all the prospects in their suits grouped together in the Barclays Center. Sometimes the best draft moments are the interviews directly after the players are selected. I don’t think that will be the case this year.

7:16 EST Sage Steele looks fantastic tonight. That is all.

7:33 PM EST Jay Bilas, Jay Williams, Rece Davis, and Mike Schmitz will head the broadcast on ESPN. Bilas is comic gold and says ridiculous things every single year.

Let’s see if ESPN continues their theme from the 2020 NFL Draft where they highlight every bad thing that has happened in each prospects life. Ive seen multiple guys crying already despite no one being selected.

7:40 PM EST Klay Thompson reportedly suffered a leg injury in a workout. There are no reports on the severity of the injury but clearly 2020 has struck again.

8:06 PM EST: The 2020 Draft has begun! My first thought is that Adam Silver looks more and more like a worm every year. Or an alien. Or the guy from Men In Black who was in charge of protecting the cat.

8:13 PM EST Anthony Edwards is the #1 pick to the Minnesota Timberwolves. His mom and grandma died within a few months of each other which is horrible. My girlfriend is crying on the couch across from me. This is the NBA Draft in 2020. Good job ESPN.

8:20 PM EST The first big decision of the night is the Golden State Warriors selecting the big man James Wiseman from Memphis. He played all of 3 games in college. Wiseman has the best shoulders to come into the league since Dwight Howard in 2005.Jay Bilas thinks he is Chris Bosh.

8:25 PM EST: LaMelo Ball to Charlotte at #3. I just checked Big Baller Brand’s website and they still sell shoes. Thats great. Is LaMelo ball good? Im not sure. You have to ask the people of Lithuania and Australia. They are the only people who have ever seen him play. But I guess it doesn’t matter since he has 6.8 million Instagram followers.

8:33 PM EST: Patrick Williams from Florida State who went #4 to the Bulls never started a game in his college career. It was only one year, but cmon! Im guessing he won’t be starting any games for Chicago either. This draft appears to be pretty much following the mocks so far.

8:43 PM EST: Issac Okoro goes to Cleveland at #5 and then Onyeka Okongwu to the Atlanta Hawks at #6.

The worst part about the virtual NBA Draft so far? The total absence of the good looking girlfriends. Its always a blast to see who the future star of your favorite teams decides to bring with him on the biggest day of his life.

Okongwu’s brother died in a skateboard accident when he was younger. Again tears..

8:49 PM EST: Killian Hayes goes to Detroit at #7. After expressing my displeasure at the lack of arm candy, the girlfriend immediately comments on Killian’s girlfriends expensive hair dye job. She looks at me and says ”I know these things”. Hayes slides to #1 in the GF rankings.

8:57 PM EST:

STEVE – Obi Toppin will be playing for his hometown team the New York Knicks. Rece Davis seemed excited to let us know his dad was featured in the And1 Mix Tape Tour. Thats a nice departure from the constant tear fest ESPN is going for.

DREW– Obi Toppin. By far the best name in the draft. New York kid gets selected by the Knicks and sobs all over the TV. Absolutely love it. His dad was Dunkers Delight on the And 1 Mixtape Tour. Put them both in the Hall of Fame immediately.

9:04 PM EST:

DREW: From the White House to the Capital One Arena, the Israeli / Washington DC connection stays strong with The Prince of Teliviv, Deni Avdija. He was picked #9 overall which is the highest Israeli prospect ever from his country

STEVE: I have never seen Avdija play but I after watching his highlight reel he may be the best player in the draft.

9:09 PM EST:

STEVE: Rece Davis and the team loves to highlight how young these guys like Devin Vassell looked in 2014. They’re 19 years old. Thats how time works Rece!

DREW: Did Devin Vassell not start at Florida State too? Who are these guys? With no March Madness, I’m lost out here.

9:19 PM EST:

STEVE: Tyrese Hailburton goes to the Sacramento Kings. Great arm candy too! Takes the #1 spot on the best looking girlfriend list from Killian Hayes.

DREW: There has got to be a Halliburton joke here I just don’t know it yet. Fantastic suit for Tyrese as well. Note: The Kings guard position looking a bit crowded. Hello Buddy Hield, weather is great here in Philly.

9:24 PM EST:

DREW: Adam Silver is deteriorating before our eyes. Kira Lewis Jr from Alabama goes 13th overall to the Pelicans. Pure speed and a pick & roll guy who was recruited by Alabama at 16 years old. He’s only 19 right now. Good piece for Zion.

9:28 PM EST:

DREW: Celtics on the clock. What a hate-able bunch these guys are. Even more so with their selection. They take Aaron Nesmith from Vandy at number 14. Apparently people think I was big on Nesmith and mentioned it on The Daily Ticket with Sean Brace and the TLL group chat. If people tell you that, they are lying. I never liked him and I hate Boston.

9:35 PM EST:

STEVE: As a University of South Carolina grad i am extremely angry that other than Alex English none those great SC born players highlighted in the segment became Gamecocks. Im out on Vanderbilt guys. Let them all end up on the Celtics.

But seriously, if Nesmith is good the Celtics are going to be a lot better next year. They were really missing a back up guard in the playoffs. Brad Wannamaker and Carson Edwards are terrible and may have cost them a trip to the NBA Finals.

9:39 PM EST:

DREW: RIP Kevin McCormick. He was very big on Cole Anthony – who just went 15th overall to the Orlando Magic. The Magic backcourt now consists of Sixers top mock draft guy Cole Anthony and former Sixers #1 Markelle Fultz. That should sit well with Philly fans.

9:41 PM EST :

STEVE: Cole Anthony was the guy I wanted as well….Oh well, nothing can bring me down today! The Sixers got rid of Al Horford! Remember?!

9:43 PM EST:

STEVE: That was my guy. Stomach punch.

Aleksej Pokusevski,

Looking like the demon child of Adam Silver. A Serbian kid having a draft party in Athens. Greece. Tell me more…

9:47 PM EST :

DREW: Draft board looking strong and the Sixers are right around the corner. Terry / Bane / Bey / Maxey all still on the board. 3 picks until Sixers at 21.

9:49 PM EST:

DREW: Clippers trade Landry Shamet to the Nets for Pick #19. Can’t wait to watch him beat up on the Sixers alongside Irving, Durant, and….Harden? Shamet was tradeable since the Clippers got Luke Kennard from the Pistons. Makes sense.

9:52 PM EST:

DREW: RJ Hampton? There’s a name I haven’t heard all night. Who doesn’t love a New Zealand Breakers guy? Hello Sixers….

9:54 PM EST:

DREW: Detroit targeting Saddiq Bey at 19 per Woj. Who hates NBA insiders spoiling the excitement of the draft on TV? I do.

STEVE: The Sixers keep missing on Nova guys. Last time this happened we ended up with Zhaire Smith. Not great. Also im pretty sure Bey was Jay Bilas’ favorite prospect with how much he spoke about him tonight.

9:58 PM EST:

DREW: Whoever the Miami Heat take at 20 better like waking up at 3 AM and taking jump shots with that psychopath Jimmy Butler.

10:04 PM EST:

STEVE: Precious Achiuwa at #20 to the Miami Heat. The Philadelphia 76ers are officially on the clock! The best available players currently are Tyrese Maxey and Jaden McDaniels. I gotta be honest neither of those guys are moving the needle for me. I think I agree with Drew that they should go with Hampton.

They aren’t sure he’s done growing yet. I like that. I like that a lot!\

10:08 PM EST:

STEVE: Bilas “Tyrese Maxey is a shot maker. Hes a combo guard with a quick first step. But he can get better.

10:11 PM EST:

STEVE: Anddddd 30 seconds into the interview Maxey began sobbing. Kind of a strange sounding cry. Not a good start Tyrese.

DREW: A very weird cry

DREW: Tyrese Maxey only shot 29.2% from 3-point range. 40% against Top 25 teams though. Some chatter saying he could be the next Booker or Herro. That’d be nice.

10:16 PM EST

DREW: Doc Rivers drafting guys to fit with Ben Simmons. Imagine thinking that the 76ers even considered trading him. That’s why you don’t listen to morons on Twitter.

10:20 PM EST:

KEVIN: I smell a rat with doc rivers

He’s got traveling salesman energy.

Like Harold Hill in music man.

He’s a band conductor. 

Also save “we” until you guys play a game. Until then keep it to they

Get a W under your belt

DREW: I’m sure everyone will like that rant.

10:27 PM EST:

STEVE: It’s stating to get to that point of the night. The Knicks just took a guy who played for Manu Ginobili in Arentina. Oh wait, sorry it was Manu’s brother. Is this still the 1st round?

KEVIN: That Maxey kid is undersized. He better shoot it 

DREW: The Bucks selected RJ Hampton traded him to the Pelicans who traded him to the Nuggets. lol.

10:30 PM EST

DREW: Check this picture out.

10:34 PM EST

STEVE: The National Media actually gave us an A-Grade on the Pick. Jonathan Tjarks of the Ringer:

Philadelphia 76ers (from OKC): Tyrese Maxey, G, Kentucky
This is a great combination of team fit and best player available for Philadelphia. Maxey is a combo guard who can play on and off the ball and defend at a high level. The only reason that he’s not a lottery pick is that he’s 6-foot-3 and won’t be a primary ball-handler in the NBA. But he won’t have to playing next to Ben Simmons. He’ll be able to defend point guards while serving as a secondary playmaker. Don’t worry too much about him shooting 29 percent from 3. Shooting 83.3 percent from the free throw line is a better indicator of his potential from deep.

10:37 PM EST

DREW: Payton Pritchard already annoys me. Have fun in Boston dork.

STEVE: He’s good at dribbling? Go try hard somewhere else. Talented people only please. He’s going to be a fan favorite for the Maine RedClaws in the G League.

That’ll do it.

Co-Host of The Misery Report. Instagram: philly_hikes.

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