Weekend Rips: Sixers open Round 1, Phillies take on Boston, Twitter users exercise futility once again
I’m not going to lie to you, Philadelphia – I woke up pissed off today. An unnamed Twitter user, after what I assume was less than two seconds of thought, came for our corporate overlords and custom apparel juggernaut DSGN Tree. While DSGN Tree handled it with grace, the entitled attitude of that guy really rubbed me the wrong way. Pair that with obnoxious Wizards fans and talking heads claiming they can challenge or even beat the Sixers in the first round, and I’m a ball of unbridled rage.
Don’t let my angry tone throughout this article get you down. If anything, let it fuel you through this weekend. Drink your beers with conviction. Trash talk on the dye or pong table. RKO a Sixers doubter, hit him with a steel chair, take his girlfriend out for a nice dinner, and never call her again. It’s time to let it rip.
Sixers open first round at home against the Wiz
I honestly cannot even believe people think this will be a challenge for the Sixers. There’s a reason we are the number one seed in the East. I’m honestly pissed I have to even acknowledge this crap. Wait… I don’t have to at all.
Joel Embiid will reignite his rivalry with Russ, Danny Green will hit 5 threes minimum, and Matisse will get a steal or block within 5 seconds of checking in. Add a couple Tyrese Maxey floaters and Ben Simmons dunks, and the Sixers will win in a blowout on Sunday. Then three more subsequent blowouts will occur. If I’m wrong, I’ll do nothing. You don’t own me! Sixers in 4.
Catch Game One on TNT at 1:00pm.
Phillies host Red Sox at The Bank
The Phils are a hot mess right now. Vinny V got hurt before he even took to the mound last night, resulting in a fat L for the boys. Now, an even more difficult challenge awaits, with the squad poised to take on the first-place Red Sox at home. Luckily, we’ve got Nola going tonight and Wheeler on Sunday, with Chase Anderson as the meat of the sandwich. That’s like getting a delicious Liscio’s roll and filling it with rancid turkey. Unfortunately, I will not be watching the Phils Sunday as the Sixers look to molly-whop the Wizards.
Hopefully, the Red Sox will get boned by the lack of a DH, but with the Phils unable to hit a beach ball, I doubt it. I think we get the win with Nola tonight but drop the next two.
Games of course are all on NBCS Philly @ 7:05 pm – 7:15pm – and 1:05pm in order.
Mickelson heating up at the PGA Championship
You think I’d miss the chance to talk about a major tournament? My man Phil Mickelson shot up the leaderboard today with a high-quality 3-under round at Kiawah. I know I watch golf just for the love of the game, but if you’re reading Weekend Rips, odds are you’re either a degenerate gambler or a sad person. In that case, bet the house on Lefty because the old weirdo is out there showing flashes of brilliance on a historically challenging course.
Tune in on ESPN and CBS, plus, for picks and much more, listen to Fox Sports The Gambler.
Liberty Line Radio
The dream is dead. Honestly, I’m surprised it lasted this long. To break down LLR this week, we need to start on Tuesday. Drew asked Sixers insider and hot piece of ass Kevin McCormick and the poofy-haired invisible man James Birrane to run with Process to Progress for LLR to get that in depth Sixers knowledge the city of Philadelphia is craving a day before game one. Kevin, the above referenced hot piece of ass, politely declined due to other obligations.
From there, all hell ensued. Jack Connell started a misinformation campaign about the show and who would be responsible doing it and Drew told everyone in the TLL Chat to “see themselves out” if they didn’t get radio done. The boys have rallied. As I write this, I’m still not sure who is doing what but I assure you, LLR will be on air with a combination of Luke, Leo, James, maybe Kevin, possibly Sixers Franklin, and whoever else wants to contribute to the beautiful mess that is Liberty Line Radio.
Tune in this Saturday from 5-6 pm and learn a little something about the Sixers. It’s appointment radio.
The Liberty Line
Drew is back in the swing of things after returning from Mouseworld. He turned over the keys to the website to a team of developers in Pakistan to fix some issues before we crank SEO up a notch. Who knows how the site will look, or even if there will be a site after they’re done with it but I have confidence in whatever is happening in Pakistan. Any time I’ve heard things about that country, it’s been great.
Also, be sure to keep an eye out on Twitter for The Philly Pod’s return to streaming. The layouts are sexy, the takes are hot, and the hosts keep it a buck. His cohost, Steven Conrad Jr. is like a dog in heat with warm weather returning to the Lehigh Valley. Someone needs to get that kid laid and fast. Between the impending breakout playoffs for Ben Simmons and his stench of virginity, I’m not sure Steven will make it through the summer without a little love.
That’s all I’ve got for now, folks. Enjoy the weekend and don’t get too arrested when the Sixers clap the Wizards Sunday. Or do. This is war, certain things must be done.
Listen to The Wolves of Broad St.
Mandatory Credit: Sporting News