Behold: Villanova Scientist, The Lizard King

It’s not everyday you stumble across some life changing information from one of your local universities and learn that Villanova is home of a scientist “The Lizard King.”
Villanova University, best known for their college basketball program and a pretty decent Division I football team, surprised me today when I discovered that it was also home to the world renowned Lizard King, Aaron Bauer.
“Aaron Bauer has traveled the world in search of lizards, logging more than 2 million miles in his quest to identify new species and determine how they fit into the tree of life. He has made more than 100 trips to southern Africa alone.
But when the pandemic restricted his travels, he pivoted to a type of journey he could make while staying in his lab at Villanova University: going back in time.
That’s how Bauer and an international group of collaborators made a rare find this winter, identifying a new species of lizard that had been trapped in amber 110 million years ago.”
via the Inquirer
That’s right. The same University that gifted us Brian Westbrook is now unleashing a globe trotting scientist, who is also quite possibly a comic book villain.
Just look at this quote from The Lizard King himself
“The world is not dominated by elephants and dinosaurs. It’s always been dominated by small animals. This is our view into this world.”
Can’t you just imagine a bearded guy wearing a fedora, and leading an army of reptiles to take over city hall as he declares that? The city is his, we’re all just worthless mammals getting in the way. Next thing you know he’s going to declare that he has a nemesis.
Oh wait, he does:
“The Cockney-accented one (gecko) depicted in the Geico car insurance commercials is wrong on at least two counts, by the way. That type of gecko is not native to England, and unlike the one on TV, it does not blink.
“Still bothers me every time I see it,” Bauer says.”
via the Inquirer
That’s right, our only hope for salvation against the Lizard King is the Geico Gecko. Let’s all just hope the CGI creation is able to distract The Lizard King long enough with his physical inaccuracies to gain the upper hand.
(If that fails maybe The Beard could thwart his dastardly plans while rehabbing his hamstring?)
Of course we shouldn’t let the awesome nickname take away from the impressive work Dr. Bauer has done during the pandemic. Using only CT scans he was able to identify a prehistoric lizard trapped in amber in Myanmar.
I know what you’re thinking when you read that, because I thought the same thing: Jurassic Park.
Unfortunately that’s not possible.
What a bummer. Maybe the disappointment of not being able to create Jurassic Park will be the thing that leads to Aaron Bauer going rogue for real? I doubt it. But you never know.
For more information on his work definitely check out the full article at The Inquirer.
Mandatory Credit: Tyger Williams, Inquirer Staff