Elon Musk challenges Vladimir Putin to duel over fate of Ukraine, Russia responds calling him a little devil and weakling
It looks like we may finally be getting somewhere in the Russian invasion of Ukraine. While America and the West sit on the sidelines and opt to sanction Putin and Russia into oblivion, Elon Musk has decided to take a different approach.
Musk, who has already given Ukraine access to his Starlink Satellite network to keep the internet up and running inside the country, took it a step further yesterday calling out Vladimir Putin on Twitter, challenging him to a duel to decide the fate of Ukraine.
Elon Musk challenges Vladimir Putin
Ukraine must Choose their Fighter: Elon Musk or Vitali Klitschko
I’m not sure if Ukraine has approved this challenge by Musk or if they are even aware that he has offered to put his life on the line to save their country. Honestly, Ukraine would probably rather have the Mayor of Kyiv, Vitali Klitschko fight Putin instead.
Klitschko is a former heavyweight boxing world champion. If you’re choosing a fighter, he has to be the number one choice to go against Putin, the former head of the KGB and an avid Judo enthusiast.
We shouldn’t overlook the fact that Vladimir Putin is a known hand-to-hand combat specialist. Sure, they might have stripped him of his ceremonial titles, but some banners fly forever. In this particular case the banner is the muscle memory that would probably allow him to defeat Musk with ease.
Joe Rogan and Neuralink
Musk’s only hope might be Joe Rogan. It’s very possible that Musk has been training in Austin, Texas with Rogan. While it’s unlikely he’s a world class fighter just yet, he may have learned enough to at least make it a fair fight.
Of course, this is all being discussed under the impression that Elon Musk is a mere human. Back in December, Musk announced that his human microchip project Neuralink was set to begin human-testing in 2022. If Musk has been successful in planting a chip in his brain, who’s to say he hasn;t already copied Bruce Lee’s genetic makeup and is basically a kung-fu cyborg?
If that’s the case, Putin might be dead on arrival.
The Kremlin’s Response
Earlier today, Kremlin officials responded to Musk’s challenge calling him a “little devil” and a “weakling”. Yes, you read that correctly. During a full-blown invasion of Ukraine, Russian officials are on Twitter responding to Elon Musk.
“You, little devil, are still young,” tweeted Dmitry Rogozin, head of Russian space agency Roscosmos. “Compete with me weakling. It would only be a waste of time.”
We are truly living in the worst simulation imaginable.
It does open up the opportunity to have the first ever boxing match in space. With two space nerds tweeting each other about fighting for the fate of Ukraine, we might as well take it up a notch and have SpaceX and the Russians meet on the moon to settle this once and for all.
If space is off the table, we should also look at one of the secret bio labs in Ukraine as a possible venue to host the fight. Winner takes all.
Musk now has no choice but to fight through Kremlin officials before reaching the final boss in Vladimr Putin. It has been reported that Ukraine and Russia are set to resume peace talks today and if the Musk-Putin Fight Card isn’t the first topic of conversation then I really don’t see this war ending anytime soon.
Mandatory Credit: AP Photo (Putin) NY Times(Musk) Getty (Sword Duel)