Cool: The Flyers are going to hire John Tortorella as their next head coach
The Philadelphia Flyers are an absolute joke of an organization that have fallen into the depths of irrelevancy in Philadelphia.
Controlled by the corporate overlords at Comcast, the Flyers have been whittled down to dust, represented only by their dumb mascot Gritty. Now that we are all on the same page, we do have some news from the Flyers, as it appears they have agreed to terms to bring in John Tortorella as their new head coach.
Look, I’m not going to pretend like I know everything about hockey. We’ll leave that to the other frauds out there like SB Nation and all of the other gatekeeping Flyers fandom dorks on social media. The only people in this city I trust to speak about the Flyers are The Liberty Yell.
However, here’s what I do know: The Flyers are going to stink regardless so who gives a shit about their new head coach? They are so far away from NHL hockey and sports fandom relevancy that I probably could coach the team.
John Tortorella Coaching History
All things considered, Torts seems to be somewhat of a hard ass which is what the Flyers need. He won the Jack Adams twice and led the Lightning to a Stanley Cup in 2004. Most recently, he coached the Columbus Blue Jackets.
He has 20 years of NHL coaching experience on four different teams and has made the playoffs 12 times. Torts holds a career 673-541-37-132 record with a points percentage of .548. In the playoffs he is 56-64.
Sounds pretty mediocre to me, which means he’ll fit right in with the Philadelphia Flyers organization.