Bryce Harper shaves head in attempt to channel Nick Sirianni…went 0-3 in Phillies loss to Cardinals

Bryce Harper rolled into Citizens Bank Park Monday night with a fresh chrome dome, hoping to flip the vibes just like Nick Sirianni did with the Eagles last season.

Bryce Harper Shaved Head

I like ya cut G pic.twitter.com/CZT9icjRJk
— Philadelphia Phillies (@Phillies) May 12, 2025

How’d it work out for Bryce Harper? Well…not great actually.

The Phillies dropped another frustrating one to the red-hot St. Louis Cardinals, 3-2, and Harper? 0-for-3 at the dish, two strikeouts, one walk, hitting out of the two-hole.

Phillies fall 3-2 as Cardinals stay annoyingly hot

On the season, Harper is now sitting at .232/.351/.419. Not exactly MVP Bryce numbers, but also not a reason to start melting down like half of Philly Sports Talk Radio is already trying to convince you to do.

I’ll say it for the one millionth time this week—Bryce Harper being in a slump in mid-May is not a problem. He’s not washed and he’s definitely not cooked. On top of that, none of this even matters right now.

The MLB season, as we all know, doesn’t truly begin until June 1st. That’s when the standings start getting real. Until then, we’re still shaking off the April rust and playing ball in shitty weather.

Would I have liked to see Harper go deep after breaking out the clippers? Of course but unfortunately, baseball doesn’t work like that. Sometimes the fresh cut is more about hitting the mental reset button than instantly dropping a 4-for-4 on the box score.

Plus, let’s be honest—this worked for Sirianni and the Birds. After he went bald, the Eagles went 16-1 and made a Super Bowl run. So sure, Bryce. Shave the head. Change the socks. Burn the bats. Whatever works.

Just, please, don’t lose to the Cardinals again tonight. We’ll chalk this one up, flush it, and move on. Sonny Gray (4-1, 3.50 ERA) gets the ball for the Cards, while the Phillies will turn to Jesús Luzardo (3-0, 2.11 ERA)—who’s been nails so far this season.

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