U.S. advises against travel to Iran, totally ruining my summer plans

The U.S. State Department released an advisory to all American citizens to avoid travel to Iran due to escalating tensions with Israel. When the news was announced, most people likely thought to themselves, “Well, yeah, no shit I shouldn’t go to Tehran. That’d be a terrible idea.”

However, we here at The Liberty Line are not most people. And, spoiler alert, my summer is RUINED.

Drew Smith, editor-in-chief of TLL, quickly pointed out that this travel warning would impact the “Tehran Takeover” trip we were planning with our esteemed partner, Phans of Philly:

I had my whole year planned around this

— Ryan Conway (@ryanconway76) June 17, 2025

Phans of Philly, of course, is the premier provider of Philadelphia sports travel packages. You buy a package, they handle flights, hotels, game tickets, and even an all-inclusive tailgate before the game.

We went to New Orleans and Los Angeles last year, and both were a phenomenal time.

So, naturally, I thought it would be an incredible idea to take the magic directly to the Islamic Republic of Iran.

We were putting our heads together to try and find a way to set up a friendly between Philadelphia Union II and Persepolis FC, a soccer team in the Persian Gulf Pro League. And, let me tell you, it was as good as booked!

Well, unfortunately, it looks like Israel hijacked the “Tehran Takeover” idea pretty severely. Instead of going to see a soccer match, they established air superiority over the entirety of Iran within 24 hours. Similar but also very, very different vibes.

I much prefer hearing “Look how many more Philly fans there are here than home fans! We really travel well” to hearing “Why is it raining death and destruction from above?” So consider my mellow harshed.

This whole thing sucks. I was so excited to get the boys together and head to Iran. I’ve researched the country extensively over the years, and wanted to see it for myself. Sure, there was a chance they would’ve thrown me in jail the second I got off the plane, but that’s the risk you run.

As TLL’s Minister of Culture and geopolitics expert, I wouldn’t blame Iran for doing that at all, either. Like pretty much every problem the U.S. has in the Middle East, this situation is entirely the fault of our government. Topple a progressive regime for oil and influence, Ayatollah takes over, they hate us. It’s a tale as old as time.

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