It’s Over: EVA AI dating cafe set to open in New York this December

Well, folks. It was nice knowing you. The world as we know it is just about gone. AI is invading every single facet of our lives, and with this new dystopian pop-up, date night is no longer sacred. All thanks to an AI dating cafe opening this winter.

Yeah… you read that right. I researched it, and it’s all too real.

EVA AI – a company that should see each and every employee jailed – is set to open its AI dating cafe this December:

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Alright, I’m starting to feel like I’m losing my mind with this AI stuff. It’s been a rabbit hole I’ve gone down recently with topics like AI marriages, porn, and children’s toys – the unholy trinity – just to name a few.

Shoutout to my buddy Bob for sending this story my way. Well, actually, fuck you, Bob. This story is giving me an existential crisis about my romantic future.

When I was first reading the article, I was so incensed by the absurdity of the whole thing that I missed that it was a limited-time event. Obviously, this wouldn’t be profitable to open in New York long-term, but I feel like the pop-up nature of the event somehow makes this entire exercise worse.

It’s not to give those seeking any form of companionship in an increasingly lonely and isolated world an opportunity to do so. I still think that’s awful and there are far better ways to do it, but at least it’d be genuine.

Instead, it’s a simple marketing ploy. Get people to sign up for the app and go just so they could say they did. I have no doubt some influencers will be discussing how great the AI companion experience was.

Next thing you know, something that was and should be an ultimate taboo is now normalized to countless people both in New York and online. People will feel better about retreating to a space where they feel comforted by an AI companion that never disagrees and never wavers in its like, love, obsession, or whatever it’s programmed to feel.

And, of course, the people at EVA AI are going to make a profit off of these people somehow. Not to steal from the person who wrote the article that inspired this post, but this cafe is essentially microdosing what it’d be like to live in the movie HER.

So, even in spite of being a pop-up, the data behind this decision by EVA AI is concerning. They claim one in three men and one in four women under 30 have conversed with an AI companion.

I’m not going to sit here and say I do exceptionally well with the ladies, but I certainly don’t do all that poorly either. When I do find myself in a romantic situation, I often find the shine rubs off in a few months. Either they suck, I suck, or, oftentimes, both of us suck.

Even so, I’ve never considered an AI companion. None of my friends have either – at least none have admitted to it.

Do I sometimes wish I could make people in my life suck less and like me more? Sure, I think everybody has experienced that from time to time. Friendships end, hearts get broken, and it totally blows to deal with.

But like I always seem to end up saying in posts about AI replacing aspects of our intimate lives, we need those shitty things to happen. Not all the time, trust me, I’d much rather a few of the girls I dated be a bit nicer to me. But you can’t fully replace your relationships with AI.

So, yeah, maybe this AI dating cafe is just a novelty that won’t have any greater effect on the minds of the American public. There’s a chance people see how weird it is, and it helps incite change in how AI is viewed in society, especially in private and intimate life.

But we humans yearn for AI slop. It’s always been the final destination. I just hope I’m not on the bus when we finally get there.

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