Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you have probably played the game “Wordle” by now or at the very least, seen other people share it on social media. You’re given six tries to correctly guess a different five letter word each day, and can then share your results online.

To be clear, these are the yellow and green bricks every nerd on Twitter posts on their timeline as an attempt to show the internet how smart they are. Anytime you can get people sharing game results online, you know you have a winner. Wordle managed to become a cultural touchdown in the most divisive era in American history. A true rarity.

People who listen to Neil Young play Wordle. Joe Rogan fans play Wordle. The people who bought 50% of Neil Young’s music and the Blackstone Group with the ex-Pfizer CEO who now is invested in Neil Young’s music play Wordle. Literally EVERYONE is playing Wordle. It’s one of life’s simple pleasures. Nobody is going to call you a “chud” or “snowflake” for liking it.

(I do maintain the right to call anybody bragging about how good they are at it a nerd though.)

So of course, like all good things, so too must this era of good feelings and Wordle come to an end.

The New York Times has bought Wordle.

The fact that The New York Times has bought the extremely popular game shouldn’t be a surprise. They have a history of buying up anything that becomes popular online if they think they can monetize it. These are the people so desperate to find stuff to monetize they bought FiveThirtyEight because Nate Silver briefly convinced people he could see the future using math.

(This was before his pals in the Calculator Crew went to work destroying basketball for ESPN.)

That’s not what I’m mad about. That’s Capitalism, baby!

If you don’t like it, hit the bricks and head to China. They’d just nationalize Wordle and force you to pay a Wordle Tax, making your success at guessing the daily Wordle count towards your social credit score. So what am I mad about? Things could always be worse.

The NYT will completely change how Wordle is viewed.

Just because I can afford a subscription to the New York Times, that doesn’t mean I’m some elitist. I’m not hanging out with the Clintons on their pals’ private jet. I’m still the same old me. Just a “me” with a subscription to a legacy media outlet.

It seems wildly unfair that my uncles and in-laws that are awaiting trials for various, let’s call them “happenings,” won’t be able to enjoy this great game anymore. That’s the tragedy.

For one brief moment, we were united as a people again. Now that’s all gone.

The Wordle today should be “SUCKS” (Get it because sucks is a five letter word.)

Mandatory Credit: The Guardian