ESPN Statsexuals project Cowboys as Super Bowl favorites over Eagles, rest of NFL

The statsexuals over at ESPN have reared their ugly head once more. This time, another algorithm built by nerds shockingly projected the Cowboys as Super Bowl favorites ahead of the Chiefs, Bills, and Eagles.
If your analytics project the Cowboys over the 11-1 Eagles, maybe the stats are the problem.
I’m heavily on record as hating analytics. In baseball, they work to a degree and are actually kind of fun, but sports like basketball and football just should leave well enough alone from projections like this.
The algorithm most certainly took their 54-point performance last night against the Colts into account. What the algorithm didn’t do, however, is watch the game and see the Colts totally implode and quit on the field, all while the Cowboys left their starters in for pretty much the entire fourth quarter despite having the win in hand.
Also, I’m using algorithm very loosely, so if I use it wrong and piss off a statsexual, I’ll chalk it up as a W.
Am I annoyed by the incessant use of advanced analytics to push a narrative? Absolutely. But what bothers me more is the smooth-brain Cowboys fans that think it means remotely anything.
We’re dealing with people that throw trash at their players, get caught cheating on live TV during a horrific loss, and tweet more about their rival than they do their own team. It’s a sad, pathetic existence for so many people, it’s hard not to feel sick over it at times.
You know what? The more I write, the more I think we should let them have this one. They need it more than us.

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Mandatory Credit: ESPN Analytics