Part-owner of the 76ers and New Jersey Devils David Blitzer reportedly acquired a 35% stake in the Cleveland Guardians. The move will give Blitzer ownership in franchises in three major American sports.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news (I actually love it), but Blitzer will not just waltz in and make improvements to the team. Do you think this guy owns a piece of six teams across the world because he has a deep passion for sports? If you do, you’re incredibly naive.

Look, Blitzer is a businessman and a damn good one at that. But that’s where it ends. Regardless of my feelings about him, he certainly knows how to make a buck. He also knows how to stay under the radar. Hell, he owns my favorite sports team of all time, and I so often forget he exists.

The problem? Blitzer is not interested in winning; he’s interested in turning a profit. Sure, having a winning team can make a lot of money – just look at the Warriors franchise. As the old saying goes, though, “you’ve got to spend money to make money.”

But do you really? It seems Blitzer is taking a page out of the great Mel Brooks’ quote book: “You can make more money with a flop than with a hit.”

Just look at the teams in which Blitzer has a stake:

The common thread? All these teams (save for the Sixers, depending on my mood) are bad, not the worst in their league. Mediocrity is the best way to make money. Just need enough wins to keep the fans hanging on by a thread, thinking it could be their year, only to finish disappointingly.

The Devils franchise is an exception; they honestly just suck. But you can’t get relegated to a lower league in American sports, which makes the investment safer.

But not to worry! Blitzer and his cronies will make money off those fans just the same. They’ll make a couple of lateral offseason moves to inspire hope, move some money around, and raise ticket prices.

I doubt he’ll even be involved in day-to-day decision-making. You have to understand, Blitzer is Blackstone guy. I’m sure the guy in the “tax fraud” shirt the other night is a buddy of his. He’ll buy the stake, take some pictures, and then disappear into the shadows, never to be heard from again.

Until, of course, he decides to buy a 27% stake in legendary Chilean soccer club Colo-Colo. In that case, you can check back here for more conspiratorial remarks from yours truly at The Liberty Line.

Now, this isn’t even really a direct shot at Blitzer, even though it definitely is. It’s more me voicing my issues with complacent ownership across sports. In fact, we see it here in Philly with the Flyers and Phillies as well. As a result, he’s partly responsible for me tweeting the following:

We see it in every league on every continent, but there is something to be said for being the complacent part owner of five teams, and those are just the ones relevant enough for me to name. No need for us to get into his dealings in Belgian professional soccer, or whatever eSports team he bought to get his son a spot (pure conjecture).

Ranting and raving aside, I just hope Guardians fans aren’t getting their hopes up. If they are, it’s going to be a long road ahead.

Blitzer’s not that guy, pals.

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