Full List: Trade options to free Brittney Griner that are better than giving Russia “The Merchant of Death” back
The United States has offered to swap convicted Russian arms dealer Viktor Bout as a part of an exchange for imprisoned Americans Brittney Griner and Paul Whelan.
Before everyone gets all pissed off that we’re talking about the Brittney Griner trade, let’s be very clear. The self-proclaimed World Wide Leader in Sports ESPN are the ones who fired off a trade deadline push notification to everyone who has their app downloaded so if you have an issue, please contact the Walt Disney Corporation.
Let’s take a look at the proposed trade that’s currently on the table.
CNN reported yesterday that the United States has offered a prisoner exchange in order to bring Griner and a gentlemen by the name of Paul Whelan home, with Joe Biden backing the decision.
In return, Russia will get Viktor Bout, a notorious arms trafficker that’s currently imprisoned in the U.S.
Who is Viktor Bout? Well, that’s where things get a little bit messy. Bout is a Russian arms dealer that reported used his multiple air transport companies to smuggle weapons since the collapse of the Soviet Union. He was getting weapons from Eastern Europe to Africa and the Middle East throughout the 1990s and early 2000s.
Clearly, Viktor wasn’t aware that ONLY the United States is allowed to provide militia and terrorist groups with arms. What an idiot.
After months of internal debate, the Biden administration has offered to exchange Viktor Bout, a convicted Russian arms trafficker serving a 25-year US prison sentence, as part of a potential deal to secure the release of two Americans held by Russia, Brittney Griner and Paul Whelan, according to people briefed on the matter.
These sources told CNN that the plan to trade Bout for Whelan and Griner received the backing of President Joe Biden after being under discussion since earlier this year. Biden’s support for the swap overrides opposition from the Department of Justice, which is generally against prisoner trades.
Okay so basically we are trading “The Merchant of Death” who gives weapons to terrorists for Brittney Griner and some normal dude who Russia believes was a spy?
Hey America, that really doesn’t seem like the smartest move. Maybe we can figure out a better way to get our people out of Russia?
Don’t get me wrong, I have written multiple times about how ridiculous it is to have Brittney Griner locked up in Russia over a few weed cartridges. It should go without saying that any American locked up abroad for ridiculous reasons should have their elected officials in the United States attempting to bring them back by any means necessary.
However, trading an international terrorist in order to get normal, innocent, citizens back would set a horrible precedent for all Americans traveling abroad moving forward. The United States government is basically showing all of their cards and getting fleeced by the Vladimir Putin.
This is a horrible trade.
If someone could please put me in touch with Joe Biden (either the real him or the deep fake) I would like to provide the following list of people that we should trade to free Brittany and the fake spy.
Brittney Griner Trade List (No Particular Order)
- Tyrone Johnson
- Jim Salisbury
- Michael Barkann
- Doc Rivers
- LeBron James
- Jack Connell
- Anyone at Deadspin
- Sixers Twitter
- Matt Gelb
- Miles Bridges
- Franklin The Dog
- Anyone who drinks White Claws
- Austin Krell
- Anyone who calls themself a “Stoolie”
- The sleeper cell animal rights protestors
- Anyone who threatened to kill me on Twitter
- Furkan Korkmaz
- Will from Stranger Things
- Carson Wentz
- Ben Simmons
- Anyone who left the PGA Tour for LIV Golf
- The Dallas Cowboys
- “Van Life” Influencers
- Skip Bayless
- Marlins Man
Russia can have any or all of the people and groups I have listed above. In return we get Brittney Griner, Paul Whelan, and three future innocent American prisoners to be named later.