Jalen Hurts denier thinks Eagles would trade him for 0 playoff wins Justin Herbert

I’d like to introduce you to the newest member of the Jalen Hurts Engagement Farm: Danny Parkins.

Like me, you’ve probably just recently hear about him. That’s because his show on FS1, Breakfast Ball, just got canned for being awful. Somehow, someway, Danny is sticking around the FS1 studios. And this week, he found his way onto The Herd, filling in for Colin Cowherd as the host.

Just like 95% of national sports media pundits nowadays, Danny doesn’t bring much to the table. He regurgitates lazy talking points and shares Top-10 lists. The modern day sports media formula.

But to his credit, he discovered a way to be relevant. He didn’t take an innovative approach by any means. No, he just set up shop in the Jalen Hurts Engagement Farm (JHEF for short).

All of Danny’s clips that have done well view-wise have been about Jalen Hurts. Saying things like, “He’s barely a Top-10 quarterback,” “He’s surrounded by an All-Star team,” “Anyone could’ve won a Super Bowl with that team!” You know, the usual.

But one of his takes actually got to me. I can’t really tell you why, because it’s not all that original or something I haven’t heard before. I think it’s more of the messenger than the message that really pisses me off.

Danny thinks the Eagles would trade Jalen Hurts to LA for Justin Herbert if presented the opportunity

TRENDING: Fox Sports talk show host Danny Parkins argued that the #Eagles would hypothetically trade Jalen Hurts for Justin Herbert if the trade was presented to them.

“[Justin Herbert] is more talented. He would be able to hand the ball off to Saquon Barkley just like Jalen… pic.twitter.com/8pw7m65MTp

— Philadelphia Eagles Central (@pheaglescentral) July 30, 2025

Look, I know this is rage bait. I am self aware enough to realize I am falling into a trap. But sometimes, as a staunch Jalen Hurts believer, I take up arms and head off to war, as any good, freedom fighting patriot would.

Danny Parkins is a fucking idiot.

The team that drafted Jalen Hurts, while still having Carson Wentz on the roster in the prime of his career, would never dream of trading him away for a guy who has shit the bed every time he’s in a big game. Talent this, talent that. You think anyone gives a fuck about talent when you’re winning Super Bowls and getting to the postseason every year?

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Do you think there’s a single Eagles fan who would support this move? The Eagles organization’s top priority, in a vacuum, is keeping fans happy. It’s a business, after all. Super Bowls make us happy. Having a strong arm and ‘arm talent’ sounds cool on paper, but football isn’t played on paper. If you’re ‘talented’ quarterback wins every year, then yeah, of course we’d like him. But if he had the career-arc of Herbert — 2 touchdowns, 4 interceptions, and a 60 QB rating in the postseason — yeah, no one would be satisfied.

In fact, I can assure you there would be a huge contingent of fans calling for him to get traded every single day. 94WIP would be unbearable. The station already revolves around the Jalen Hurts discussion, and the guy just won Super Bowl MVP. You think it would be any better if we had a ‘talented’ quarterback who hasn’t won shit? You’re out of your mind, Danny! You’re talking nonsense!

I also want to circle back to Danny himself, because if you couldn’t tell by the featured image up top and the way I’ve described him throughout, I’m taking this personally and I genuinely don’t like this guy.

I refuse to let a Donkey face nerd tell me what’s best for my football team. I simply won’t have it. No one wants or needs the type of content Danny has built his brand on. He’s not a real person — he’s an android who has been programmed with the brain-dead algorithm of NFL Twitter. Nothing original to say. Nothing insightful to add to the conversation. Just gibberish disguised as thoughtful discourse because he looks ‘smart.’

Donkey Danny should sit this one out. I get that clicks and views make your little pecker hard and that dopamine rush can be quite intoxicating, but I think it’s time you stop the charade and seek help. I want you to be better than this, Dan.

If you or someone you love is suffering from Jalen Hurts Derangement Syndrome (JHDS), please — don’t wait. Call 1-800-HURTS-ME today. Operators are standing by to help FS1 hosts rediscover joy, balance, and maybe even a QB with playoff wins.