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Kalani Sitake PSU BYU Crumbl Cookie

Crumbl Cookie CEO is fighting off Penn State, willing to do whatever it takes to keep Kalani Sitake at BYU

College football is a beautiful, stupid sport. Every December it becomes a soap opera written by people who have never heard of HR, boundaries, or timelines that make sense. Even with all the ridiculousness we expect every year, the Kalani Sitake situation has taken things to another level.

Penn State athletic director Pat Kraft has been teasing a mystery candidate for weeks. A huge name. Someone he refused to identify because if word got out, that coach’s community would go absolutely nuclear trying to keep him.

Turns out he was right. The mystery candidate appears to be BYU head coach Kalani Sitake. And BYU fans have detonated in a way that only a fanbase powered by religion and sugar money possibly could.

Kalani Sitake could really be the perfect candidate for Penn State

Kalani Sitake appears to check every box. He is in his 10th season at BYU. He wins football games and all things considered, develops players, something that James Franklin failed to do in Happy Valley.

He rarely complains publicly, but everyone knows he has been frustrated with resources inside BYU’s athletic department. He wants a bigger toolbox. Penn State can hand him the entire Home Depot.

BYU joined the Big 12 in 2023. Kalani Sitake immediately turned them into a contender. He is sitting on consecutive 11-win seasons and is about to coach the Cougars in the biggest game in program history, a Big 12 Championship matchup with Texas Tech where the winner goes straight into the College Football Playoff.

Penn State has already met with him. There is mutual interest. Staff discussions have taken place. No deal is signed yet, but this is real.

Then the BYU panic button got smashed like a glass case

Once the reports surfaced, BYU fans did exactly what Kraft feared. They freaked out. They mobilized. They made emotional videos. They opened group chats called Save Kalani like it was a hostage situation.

They also deployed their secret weapon.

Enter Crumbl Cookie CEO, the richest cookie warlord in America

Jason McGowan, the CEO and co-founder of Crumbl Cookies, jumped onto X and basically declared a fatwa on Penn State’s coaching search.

“Some people are not replaceable. Sounds like it is time for me to get off the sidelines and get to work.”

That is not a normal donor message. That is the kind of message you drop before wiring a coach eight figures and a Tesla Cybertruck filled with snickerdoodles.

McGowan is a Michigan State alum, but he married into BYU fandom. His wife earned a PhD there, and ever since then he has operated as BYU’s unofficial bank. He donates. He pays fines. He even covered the field-storming penalty when BYU beat Utah this year because the fans deserved to celebrate.

His personal net worth is estimated at $500 million. Crumbl’s valuation is nearly $2 billion. This is not a booster throwing pocket change. This is a man with the financial ability to keep a head coach on retainer like a personal chef.

He then doubled down with the viral post above telling BYU fans to publicly share what Kalani Sitake means to them so the school will feel the pressure.

Meanwhile, Penn State sits quietly in the corner like a man trying not to look suspicious

According to ESPN, Sitake is Penn State’s top target. Both sides have met. Both sides have interest. Both sides have discussed long-term details. Penn State wants this done. BYU wants this killed. Kalani Sitake is trying to prepare for the biggest game of his life while also deciding whether to uproot his entire career.

All of this is happening because college football refuses to fix the most chaotic schedule in American sports. Coaching hires should never overlap with championship week.

Everyone knows it. No one fixes it.

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More on Kalani Sitake

He wins. A lot. He has guided BYU to at least ten wins in four of the last six seasons. After a rough transition year, BYU has gone 15-3 in Big 12 play the last two seasons. He found his quarterback of the future in Bear Bachmeier. His players love him.

His fanbase treats him like family. Losing him would break BYU’s heart in a way Penn State fans could never fully understand.

Will Crumbl Cookie save BYU?

This entire saga has everything. Big Ten money. Religious loyalty. A cookie billionaire mobilizing an army. Penn State waiting for the green light. A championship game looming. A fanbase melting down and a head coach trying to block out the noise while preparing for the biggest moment of his life.

No one knows how this ends. Kalani Sitake could stay or go. Penn State could pivot. BYU could drop a truck-sized cookie bag on his doorstep.

Any way the cookie crumbles, college football has never been pettier, stranger, or more perfect. Time to find out exactly how much Crumbl Cookie Guy loves his coach.

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