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Jonathan Papelbon: “The Phillies are way sexier than the Diamondbacks”

Jonathan Papelbon did something that didn’t make Philadelphia roll its collective eyes by acknowledging the unprecedented sex appeal of the Phillies. No offense to the Diamondbacks, but they can’t compete with the Phils in this arena.

Papelbon said what everyone already knows, this Phillies team is sexy as hell:

You may not like it, but Jonny Pap-smear is right on the money with this one. We’ve reached the point where Nick Castellanos’ wife had to limit how many buttons he can unbutton because he gets the fans that riled up.

I mean, just look at Twitter. The entire timeline is horny for pretty much every player on the Phillies roster. The number of shirtless pics with depraved captions

I’ve never seen a group of professional athletes more objectified by its fan base in my life. It’s reached the point where it’s borderline uncomfortable for me to read.

When the Phillies win a playoff series, it’s the Age of Sodom on social media. I can’t be too mad, though, because they may be the sexiest team in MLB history.


Gear up in the TLL Shop

Very real and legitimate journalist. I don't see a loss on the schedule.

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